And now for the Friday entertainment, this one has been around for a while but still brings a smile to my face:

213 Things Skippy Is No Longer Allowed to Do in the US Army

Some examples:

3. Not allowed to threaten anyone with black magic.

4. Not allowed to challenge anyone’s disbelief of black magic by asking for hair.

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77. The MP checkpoint is not an Imperial Stormtrooper roadblock, so I should not tell them “You don’t need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for.”

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145. I should not drink three quarts of blue food coloring before a urine test.

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193. The Masons, and Gray Aliens are not in our chain of command.

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